There is something very satisfying about getting new shoes especially when they are red shoes and can help take you out into the beautiful Derbyshire countryside.
I used to run a lot, then hurt myself, stopped, started, lost motivation, started again. Stopped. Depression returned and with it a blanket of low self esteem and irritability. Outside of my home, you wouldn’t know this as I continue to work and smile on a daily basis but often returning home to sleep for 10 hours or not sleep more than 3 – 4 hours, waking with swirling thoughts. When my dog died at Easter, I found myself wondering why I was carrying on like this and decided to get medical help. Three months later and I have new red shoes, been wild swimming, have a wild camping trip planned and the most cheerful four-legged running partner ever.
I have to admit I’ve been inspired by a friend whose openness about her depression and recovery through social media has encouraged me to do the same.
I’ve also started reading a wonderful eco therapy book with a basis in Buddhism, it’s really challenging my thoughts on being self centred and seeing the world as something I use, not just enjoying its existence. I concentrated today, in my red shoes, on enjoying the existence of the physical world around me and trying to enjoy the mindfulness of my time with Florence and the moor.